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Discussion Starter #61
Welcome back.:rolling: :rolling:

As 73vettegirl walked into the office Christmas party, her husband said, you look great tonight, you should leave your bra home all the time.

How did you know, she asked.

He said, all the wrinkles from your face are gone.

:smack :smack :smack
 

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Bob88 and his wife went to the chemist to pick up his prescription for Viagra. Seeing the $10 per pill price, Bob was astonished - but his wife had a different opinion - "Oh, $40 a year ain't too bad". :rolling: :rolling:
 

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Bob88 went to the local drug store and asked the pharmacist for Viagra. The pharmacist said, "That's no problem. How many do you want?"


Bob answered, "Just a few, maybe four, but cut each one into four pieces."


The pharmacist said, "That won't do you any good."


Bob said, "That's all right. I'm old - I don't need them for sex anymore. I just want it to stick out far enough so I don't pee on my shoes." :laughing: :laughing:
 

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I don’t know if I said anything but 73vettegirl came over to our house to spend a few days. She got up early on Saturday morning to make breakfast. It was very early, Laura and I were still in bed, and the house was cold (you will see why in a moment:))! I put my robe on and found her in the kitchen making muffins naked as a jaybird! :surprised

As I watched she would press an indention with one of her “chests” :D (the reason for the cold:)) put a raisin in the depression press an indention into the next with her other "chest" did the same thing, put a cherry, then next she put pieces of a pecan and so on. I watched her work in amazement. Finally I couldn’t stand it any longer and asked what the hell she was doing.

She coyly responded "makin’ muffins my way sweetie", though I made the dough but need your help, would you make the donuts?

:laughing:
 

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Discussion Starter #69

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73VetteGirl and her hubbie were having some marital problems.. So, Hubbie decided to try a little role playing.

Tonight were going to play Fireman! 73VetteGirl got all excited and said Sure!

When I get home, I'll open the door and yell "1st Alarm"! That's your queue to run up the stairs. When I reach the staris, I'l yell "2nd Alarm"! That's your queue to run into the bedroom and get naked. When I reach the bedroom, I'll yell "3rd Alarm"! That when you jump into bed and get ready for some hot sex!

That night, 73VetteGirl's hubbie gets home, and opens the door.. "1st Alarm"!
he reaches the stairs and yells "2nd Alarm"! He climbs the stairs, gets to the bedroom and yells "3rd Alarm"! He rips his clothes off, and jumps into bed and starts making hot love.. 73VetteGirl starts yelling out.. "4th Alarm"! "4th Alarm" !! Hubbie stops, and looking puzzled... says "What the hell is a "4th Alarm?

73VetteGirl smiles and says.. "MORE HOSE" !!!
 

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73VetteGirl and her hubbie were having some marital problems.. So, Hubbie decided to try a little role playing.

Tonight were going to play Fireman! 73VetteGirl got all excited and said Sure!

When I get home, I'll open the door and yell "1st Alarm"! That's your queue to run up the stairs. When I reach the staris, I'l yell "2nd Alarm"! That's your queue to run into the bedroom and get naked. When I reach the bedroom, I'll yell "3rd Alarm"! That when you jump into bed and get ready for some hot sex!

That night, 73VetteGirl's hubbie gets home, and opens the door.. "1st Alarm"!
he reaches the stairs and yells "2nd Alarm"! He climbs the stairs, gets to the bedroom and yells "3rd Alarm"! He rips his clothes off, and jumps into bed and starts making hot love.. 73VetteGirl starts yelling out.. "4th Alarm"! "4th Alarm" !! Hubbie stops, and looking puzzled... says "What the hell is a "4th Alarm?

73VetteGirl smiles and says.. "MORE HOSE" !!!
:rolling: :rolling: :thumbsup:
 

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sfallison's wife was driving her Chevrolet Vega home in Lewisville, TX when she saw an elderly Apache woman walking along the side of the road. She stopped the car and asked the woman if she would like a lift?

With a silent nod, the woman climbed into the car. sfallison's wife tried in vain to make conversation with the Apache woman.

The old Apache looked closely at everything she saw, studying every little detail, until she noticed a red gift bag on the seat next to sfallison's wife.

'What's in the bag?' asked the old woman.

'It's a bottle of gin that I got for my husband.'

The Apache woman was silent for another minute or two. Then speaking with the quiet wisdom of an elder, she said, 'Good trade.'
:laughing: :laughing:
 

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sfallison's wife was driving her Chevrolet Vega home in Lewisville, TX when she saw an elderly Apache woman walking along the side of the road. She stopped the car and asked the woman if she would like a lift?

With a silent nod, the woman climbed into the car. sfallison's wife tried in vain to make conversation with the Apache woman.

The old Apache looked closely at everything she saw, studying every little detail, until she noticed a red gift bag on the seat next to sfallison's wife.

'What's in the bag?' asked the old woman.

'It's a bottle of gin that I got for my husband.'

The Apache woman was silent for another minute or two. Then speaking with the quiet wisdom of an elder, she said, 'Good trade.'
:laughing: :laughing:
:cheers: :rolling: :rolling:

Ok.. I got :spanked:
 

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73vettegirl got married. She is a good cook and likes to cook, so she asked her new husband as he was headed out the door to work what he wanted for supper. He thought for a min. and said, "Surprise me sweetheart you are a good cook" and then left. So starting about 1 PM she starts preparing an elaborate 4 course dinner the two would enjoy over candlelight, very romantic.
He come home, opens the door she is standing in her evening gown just inside, he grabs her, takes her up stairs and they make love for the rest of the evening, and exhausted they both fall asleep.

The next morning she asks again what he wants for dinner, spends all afternoon preparing it with the same result, exhausted; they fall asleep, another dinner ruined.

On the third day hubby comes home. No 73vettegirl at the front door, yet he hears running up the stairs. He steps around the corner and sees her buck naked, running up the stairs, then sliding down the banister, running up the stairs, sliding down the banister, running up the stairs ... you get the idea ...

He yells out "what are you doing"

She replies, "Warming supper! "

:laughing:
 

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Bob and Bassist are out hunting in the back 40.
They've been out a while, and Bob is sighting up his scope.

Hey Bassist.. I can see your ol Lady
Bassist sez. Yea? What's she doing?

Bob gasps.. Holy ****! she naked with another guy!

Bassist gets pissed.. and says.. "Bob, Shoot her in the head, and shoot him in the balls"!

Bob smiles.. I can do that in one shot!
 
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